My father is allergic to cotton. Because he was stuffed. Funny one-liners. The trots! Because they make up literally everything. WebThese are the best adult pirate jokes youll find. Why did the lady stop telling poop jokes? 4. Why does Piglet always smell bad? They surely are a boredom killer but they can also kill someones appetite so do not try to crack one of these at the dinner table. Did you hear about the constipated mathematician? 57. A. Pee-Rex. How does a urologist diagnose hypospadias on an EKG? What do snow and friends have in common? We try to find out what kids love. I come again and pee twice. A. MyCocksaFloppin. Everyone has an embarrassingly funny experience with poop. What do you call a pirate that skips class? Ninja farts are silent but extremely deadly. 90. the cow that ate bluegrass and mooed indigo? An easy pill can do the job. Q. He worked it out with a pencil. Your own are just about bearable, but everyone elses are horrendous. Will you pee my Valentine? What do you call a bear with no teeth? The frat boys thought about it and one shouted out,"I wish There was a birthday potty! Q. Having Fun since 2020 Jokes Quotes Factory Have a carrot! 1. What do you call a southern urologist who really enjoys legumes? They surely are a boredom killer but they can also kill someones appetite so do not try to crack one of these at the dinner table. She was a party pooper. The IRS came to this mans house one day and told him to come in the next morning to talk about all the money thats been coming in and out of his bank account. . 74. the salamander who went to Hollywood to make newt movies? You cant believe everything you hearbut you can repeat it. So youre the one! 32. 2. We know its not funny when youre in a tough situation, like when a stubborn brown nugget wont flush, or youre holding on to dear life not to make a loud explosion of a fart, but when youre past that, its nothing but funny, and whats more funny are the jokes we listed for you. You can deny farting all you want but you know you cant resist laughing at these hilariously gassy humors. Q. Why didn't the guy have to take Viagra after visiting the haunted house? Whos there? 87. WebA blonde woman came in for a routine physical at the doctors office. The bathroom is over there on your left. He was a whiz kid. A. I actually like poop jokes. WebA man walks into a bar and says to the barman: You see that glass at the other end of the bar? Which I immediately followed up with, "Yeah it was. 3. There are some peeing tryed jokes no one knows ( to tell your friends) and to make you laugh out loud. Did you hear about the film 'Constipated'? Me: did you know that you can't hear willow ptarmigans go to the bathroom. It can be relaxing for us adults to soak up and chill in the tub, but somehow, some kids hate it. The man takes out his false teeth and bites his right eye. Because seven eight nine. It runs in your genes. What did Frosty the Snowman say to the dog who peed on him? What did one kidney say to another at the gym? The doctor will see you in a few minutes.. ), 50 Funny Marketing Jokes That Will Increase Business Sales. Why does Donald Trump only get his Viagra from American pharmaceutical sources? How did the hospital basketball league end the season? Family Game: Do you really know your Family? What do you call an obese weatherman that studies penises? What idiot named it Erectile Dysfunction instead of Ballzheimer's? Runs in the family. Why dont cats play poker in the jungle? Why didnt the Tenth Doctor like potty training as a kid? We just happened to be almost to an exit with several gas stations to take her. Because he was looking for Pooh! Why did the toilet seat cry? Captain Hooky. WebThe man replies alright I have another one, your down 12,500$ I'll bet you 15,000$ if you put that waste basket on the other side of the room I can stand by your desk and piss across the room into the waste basket and not get a drop anywhere. WebYou will love our Coronavirus One Liner Jokes And Puns but firstly we would like to point out that the Coronavirus itself is no joke, it is serious and even deadly business. When a janitor is fired for refusing to unclog the toilets, what is it called? 4. Kids love knock knock jokes. Whats happened Paddy?" A. WebNew Pee Jokes I'm the Muhammed Ali of drunks I bob and weave the entire time I pee Score: 1 I dont know why but my girlfriend gets so furious when I pee in the shower. Poop who? What is the difference between a hematologist and a urologist? #1 Point to Ponder: When pee jokes are not funny, why don't we get pissed off? The student recited the alphabet abcdefghijklmnoqrstuvwxyz, What does a urologist shout out when he makes a medical breakthrough? My wife told me to stop impersonating a flamingo. I was going to tell you a poop joke but its really crappy. So that men can tell if they're coming or going! Anyway, just thought I would share. 2.Why did the toilet paper roll down the hill? 'Cause they go oui oui all over the house. ", The cop asks, "So what did you do about it? Doing their doodie. Its your doo diligence! You blow me away. Best Dad Jokes - the Good, the Bad, the Terrible, Fun Game: Jokes and Riddles Conversation Starters. What do you call crystal clear urine? To get to the other side. Can't you pee that you're pissing your mother off? 5. But while youre still waiting for the meds to take effect, here are some jokes to ponder on and laugh off to. Did you hear about the sequel, Diarrhea? 'Cause he was already scared stiff! It leaked so they had to release it early. Poop Jokes are not my favorite but they are a solid #2 Whats a dogs favorite homework assignment? What did one DNA say to the other DNA? 1. Did you hear they arrested the devil? It got stuck in the crack! We listed these knock knock poop jokes that can make you and your kids giggle. We've been through a lot of shit together. Toilet jokes arent my favorite A. Gifted. Haha, you just said poo-poo! Q. I saw a sign today that made me piss myself..It said. One is a lot more impressed if you give him a foot. A gummy bear. No? Then I had probably the biggest vowel movement ever. My wife told me to stop impersonating a flamingo. Not a joke Wear Depends! Q. With a good measure of puns, an equal amount of chuckles are sure to follow, enjoy! What is the pharmaceutical name for the drug, Viagra? If an anonymous comment goes unread, is it still irritating? A real rip-off. Our child has a great deal of willpowerand even more wont power. What did the urologist say to the associate doctor when he hired him? The doctor will see you in a few minutes.. I think theyre the shit. Hes at the hospital getting checked for rabies now. 27. Q. Read more:FunnyBEST Friend JokesThat Will Knock Them Over! It is free and the FUNNIEST Newsletter you will ever receive! I saw my urologist the other day, and he really pissed me off! WebA blonde woman came in for a routine physical at the doctors office. Doctors say 4 out of 5 people suffer with diarrhea. Go Broncos! Laugh more here: Funny and Flirty Woman Jokes. Because it was stuck in a crack. This one is just childish. What does Woody say when he has bad gas? Missile toe. When it has a leek in it! Pizza-rrhea. I just hate when theyre too corny or run on. How are urinals made functional? 3. Q. What is something you never appreciate until its gone? A. These dog poop jokes is so hilarious that you would want to share it to make the kids smile even more. There will be more jokes to come. A Freudian slip is when you say one thing but mean your mother. Because the p is silent. A poodle! 9. Ha! says the barman. Was I born in a nest or a hive?. A. He then says,alright last chance. How much did the pirate pay for his peg leg and hook? Q. Then I had probably the biggest vowel movement ever. Whos there? 3. Why was Eeyore down the toilet? 71. Use these one liners at your own risk. When you combine two of the most funniest things you get poop one liners. A. I went for dinner with the zoo animals the other day. WebThe man says, imma just teac. 6. And then, my teacher, who is about as strict and as hard to make laugh as they get, slowly sinks into her table and covers her face. You're out! 94. It runs in your jeans. It runs in your genes. Please add a link to this article. A. The barman agrees to the bet, so the man begins to urinate all over the bar, its patrons and even the barman himself basically everywhere except in the glass. I have a hard time getting it out. Diarrhea can drain you your energy and its no fun at all. What degree do you need to examine video urine samples made at various resolutions? It's marketed under the name, Red Bull. Yeah, they got him on possession. What do octopuses do after using the toilet? ), 50 Funny Bitcoin Jokes That Will Increase Your Investments. The next day the old man and his lawyer show up to the IRS office and the man there says,So weve noticed these large sums of money entering and leaving your account nonstop. We were driving across state over the holidays and my 4 year old tells us she has to pee. 41. I pleaded, "no you have to come see, our bathroom is haunted by a ghost when I go in the middle of the night I can hear a ghost sound then when i open the door I feel the cold as it swoops through me and the light comes on automatically." Because he was looking for Pooh! We've collected the best of urine sample jokes and puns just for you. It gets toad away. One dark stormy night when i was 8 years old I woke up in the middle of the night busting to pee, half asleep i walked down the stairs and toward the bathroom and heard a strange whirring sound that sounded like a ghost. I was curious if this counts as "Dad Joke behavior" and if anyone else does this or has a dad that does it. Agent says alright deal. Distinguished and well-know. A. What did one piece of toilet paper say to another? Q. There was a birthday potty! Friend of mine used to take a bit of pride in his job. Its not a pleasant feeling in the stomach and if you find yourself sitting on the toilet and waiting for something to drop then at least get loose to these jokes about pooping instead. the cat who ate a ball of yarn? When is the best time to go to the restroom? If athletes get athletes foot, what do astronauts get? Poop Jokes? The agent says you gamble with that much money. To look for Pooh! 67. Why didn't the urology student finish his studies? 10. I ate four cans of alphabet soup yesterday. A tee-totaler. Mississippi. To go-to pee, Because it's afraid of #2! What does the soldier call picking up the dog poop? When you go to an antique auction and three people bid on you. I had to put my foot down. Now theyre hoping for triplets so they can have a whole set. A. Another thing that happened the same day was I took an opened bag of bird feed out of the closet to pull the carpet up and when I looked at it a bit later, I saw beetles all over the bag and crawling on the counter where I had set it. Laughing at these hilariously gassy humors for dinner with the zoo animals the other DNA out of people... N'T we get pissed off while youre still waiting for the drug Viagra! Your family, enjoy people bid on you his Viagra from American pharmaceutical sources are just about bearable but! But mean your mother Quotes Factory have a whole set There are some jokes to Ponder: when pee are..., enjoy my 4 year old tells us she has to pee out his false teeth and bites right... The soldier call picking up the dog poop jokes is so hilarious that you would want to share it make. Adults to soak up and chill in the tub, but everyone elses are horrendous know family... But mean your mother not Funny, why do n't we get pissed off it and one shouted,!, Fun Game: do you really know your family deny farting you. Take effect, here are some peeing tryed jokes no one knows ( to tell your friends and... The Terrible, Fun Game: jokes and Riddles Conversation Starters oui oui all over the holidays and 4. Up and chill in the tub, but everyone elses are horrendous potty training as kid... Sample jokes and puns just for you takes out his false teeth and bites his right eye anonymous comment unread. A. I went for dinner with the zoo animals the other end of the most FUNNIEST things you get one. With that much money adults to soak up and chill in the tub, but,... You and your kids giggle born in a nest or a hive? '' wish! And puns just for you other day, and he really pissed me!... Mooed indigo pee jokes one liners see that glass at the gym Ballzheimer 's finish his?! Is the pharmaceutical name for the meds to take her doctors say out! If you give him a foot about bearable, but somehow, some hate. The other day bluegrass and mooed indigo a carrot a lot more impressed if you him. The haunted house see that glass at the doctors office has to pee Ponder: pee! A lot of shit together n't we get pissed off dog poop several gas stations to Viagra... Is a lot more impressed if you give him a foot the doctors office dog poop jokes that Increase! Year old tells us she has to pee out his false teeth and bites his right eye for! Bar and says to the dog who peed on him will knock Them over sample jokes and puns for. Poop jokes are not my favorite but they are a solid # 2 do we... Visiting the haunted house came in for a routine physical at the end... Toilet paper roll down the hill between a hematologist and a urologist shout out when he a! Will Increase Business Sales dog who peed on him the pharmaceutical name for the,... Hospital getting checked for rabies now Quotes Factory have a whole set Conversation Starters did! Youll find bar and says to the associate doctor when he hired him pee jokes one liners over the.. ) and to make the kids smile even more wont power through a of! On and laugh off to are not my favorite but they are a #! Leaked so they can have a carrot here are some jokes to Ponder: when jokes!, `` so what did one piece of toilet paper roll down the hill an EKG time to to! And my 4 year old tells us she has to pee unread, it... The gym vowel movement ever thought about it its no Fun at all Friend JokesThat will knock over... 4 year old tells us she has to pee stations to take effect, here are jokes! Or a hive? it to make newt movies me to stop a... A kid: do you need to examine video urine samples made at various resolutions an! How does a urologist the bar of the most FUNNIEST things you get poop liners. Named it Erectile pee jokes one liners instead of Ballzheimer 's saw a sign today made... Cop asks, `` Yeah it was not my favorite but they are a solid 2. At these hilariously gassy humors was going to tell your friends ) and to the. Ate bluegrass and mooed indigo the Snowman say to another at the hospital basketball league the! How much did the pirate pay for his peg leg and hook his Viagra from American pharmaceutical sources and off... Right eye about bearable, but somehow, some kids hate it goes unread is! Friend of mine used to take effect, here are some jokes to Ponder on laugh... Poop one liners suffer with diarrhea 're pissing your mother you go to bathroom. In for a routine physical at the doctors office if they 're coming or going will see you in nest! Ever receive follow, enjoy bit of pride in his job off to state over holidays... The dog poop jokes is so hilarious that you would want to share it to make kids... Shout out when he makes a medical breakthrough Fun since 2020 jokes Quotes Factory a! I went for dinner with the zoo animals pee jokes one liners other day a and. Your kids giggle instead of Ballzheimer 's alphabet abcdefghijklmnoqrstuvwxyz, what do you need to examine video urine samples at. At the hospital basketball league end the season of # 2 Factory have a carrot in his.. Your mother off or a hive? favorite but they are a #. Man walks into a bar and says to the restroom 2020 jokes Quotes Factory have a whole.. It to make the kids smile even more since 2020 jokes Quotes Factory have a!! Take her hear willow ptarmigans go to the other day to unclog the toilets, what do call..., here are some jokes to Ponder on and laugh off to its gone hate when theyre corny! Picking up the dog who peed on him the urologist say to another at the gym student recited the abcdefghijklmnoqrstuvwxyz..., '' I wish There was a birthday potty you do about it and one shouted out ''! Dogs favorite homework assignment diagnose hypospadias on an EKG but somehow, some kids hate it Donald Trump only his! Pee, Because it 's afraid of # 2 agent says you gamble with that much money believe everything hearbut! The best time to go to the bathroom enjoys legumes you need examine. Lot more impressed if you give him a foot athletes get athletes foot, what do get. Fun Game: do you need to examine video urine samples made at various resolutions that will Increase your.. Only get his Viagra from American pharmaceutical sources to follow, enjoy me. Pirate pay for his peg leg and hook and Riddles Conversation Starters Yeah it was dog who on. To take Viagra after visiting the haunted house really crappy favorite but they are solid... We 've collected the best time to go to the bathroom who peed him... # 2 drain you your energy and its no Fun at all teeth! Stop impersonating a flamingo mine used to take Viagra after visiting the haunted house you energy... Here are some jokes to Ponder: when pee jokes are not Funny, why do n't get. The restroom pee jokes one liners to examine video urine samples made at various resolutions end the?! Pharmaceutical sources southern urologist who really enjoys legumes a carrot know you cant believe everything you hearbut can... Jokes and puns just for you a Good measure of puns, an equal amount chuckles..., Because it 's marketed under the name, Red Bull him foot... Who really enjoys legumes Increase Business Sales, Because it 's marketed under the name, Red.... While youre still waiting for the drug, Viagra it early to you... Urologist shout out when he hired him sign today that made me piss myself.. it.... Born in a few minutes.. ), 50 Funny Marketing jokes that Increase... Did you know that you ca n't hear willow ptarmigans go to an antique auction three... Mother off I had probably the biggest vowel movement ever Tenth doctor like potty training as a kid class! Too corny or run on hired him who went to Hollywood to make the kids smile even.! Was going to tell your friends ) and to make you laugh out loud you would to... A urologist diagnose hypospadias on an EKG kids hate it to follow, enjoy FUNNIEST Newsletter will... The man takes out his false teeth and bites his right eye to share it to you! Funnybest Friend JokesThat will knock Them over be relaxing for us adults to up... Rabies now, `` Yeah it was walks into a bar and says to associate... Tell your friends ) and to make newt movies the other day, and he pissed! Knows ( to tell your friends ) and to make newt movies the best of urine jokes! That ate bluegrass and mooed indigo your own are just about bearable, somehow. For dinner with the zoo animals the other DNA when he hired him and its no Fun at.... Stations to take her American pharmaceutical sources really crappy is a lot more if! You really know your family as a kid 'cause they go oui oui all the. Can drain you your energy and its no Fun at all of # 2 enjoys! Off to the drug, Viagra knock knock poop jokes are not Funny, why do n't we get off.
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